Friend Who Cooks Terribly


I have a friend I’ve been close to for the past two years. She and her husband like to have us over for Shabbos meals often, just as much as we like to have them. The problem is, she is the worst cook in the world and her food is absolutely disgusting. So much that I’d rather eat dog food (if it were kosher; I mean it figuratively) than her own cooking. She does not recognize this and she feels she is a master chef. And I don’t have the heart to tell her how I feel about her cooking.

Whenever my husband and I are over, we have to physically force ourselves to eat her food, all as we feel like vomiting with each bite. And we feel compelled to praise her for it in order to be polite. She doesn’t get it how we feel. We feel very close to her and her husband, but we don’t feel comfortable insulting her over her food. We don’t know how to handle this. We look forward to socializing with this couple, who are one of our best friends, but dread their food.

As a rabbi, what is your advice?



  1. I am sorry that I do not have a magic solution to suggest. The only correct thing to do is to carry on eating her food and not to say a word to her or her husband. To do otherwise would be so incredibly hurtful that I am doubtful that your friendship could survive the ill feelings that any comments would generate.

    Best wishes from the Team