Customs

Hello, I was wondering about what is the custom for putting a stone on a gravestone. And also about the custom of using one set of dishes for milk and another one for meat. Is that a religious or hygienic reason? Thanks

Rabbi, I have some questions about rachatz. Some will be opinion questions. Please answer whatever you like and leave the rest. It concerns the wedding at Cana, John chapter 2 -- which I copy here: -- On the third day there was a marriage at Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there; Jesus also was invited to the marriage, with his disciples. When the wine failed, the mother of Jesus said to him, "They have no wine." And Jesus said to her, "O woman, what have you to do with me? My hour has not yet come." His mother said to the servants, "Do whatever he tells you." Now six stone jars were standing there, for the Jewish rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus said to them, "Fill the jars with water." And they filled them up to the brim. He said to them, "Now draw some out, and take it to the steward of the feast." So they took it. When the steward of the feast tasted the water now become wine, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the steward of the feast called the bridegroom and said to him, "Every man serves the good wine first; and when men have drunk freely, then the poor wine; but you have kept the good wine until now." This, the first of his signs, Jesus did at Cana in Galilee, and manifested his glory; and his disciples believed in him. -- 1) That sounds like an awful lot of water for rachatz before oneg -- some 150 gallons for a rather small synagogue. Could it be that the water was left there continually for anybody attending or visiting the schul to daily wash up? 2) Archaeologists find that the synagogue had a mikvah, underground nearby, I think. Could it be that a woman or a man coming for a mikvah would take a pitcher of this water with him to rinse off before entering the mikvah? 3) Would people ladle out water to wash their hands? Or is it possible, at that time, they might have dipped their hands? 4) Would the wine in these stone jars defile them? And if so, would they need to be replaced? 5) Jesus didn't need to use these jars nor this water. He told the servants to dip out some wine and bring it to the steward. It wasn't a public miracle. Only the servants and, I suppose, some of the disciples knew about the specially produced wine. But John calls it, not a miracle, but a sign. Other than the obvious (wine is a nicer drink than water,) -- and this was before Jesus equated wine with his blood -- what, in your opinion, could have been the sign Jesus intended? I will be very much pleased to hear back from you. Peter

Hi Rabbi, I recently went to a class about the “Portion of the Week”, and when the Rabbi concluded the lesson I felt that I should clap my hands to applaud in appreciation for the very interesting class. However, the other attendees didn’t clap, so I decided not to either, although I did tell the Rabbi how much I enjoyed the class. My question is, “Why didn’t everybody applaud? The class was truly outstanding.” Thanks.

Hi. I have a wedding question. I was wondering if the practice for the groom to give a ring to the bride has always been the case. Does this tradition go back, say, as far as Abraham? And why is the wedding ring placed on the forefinger of the right hand?

Hi If you have been saying shehakol nihiyeh bidvaro and you read from learning that Sephardim it’s shehakol nihiyah bidvaro, is it more fitted to switch to saying nihiyah bidvaro, or maybe it’s become accepted among both Ashkenazim and Sephardim to say nihiyeh, so better to continue with nihiyeh?