Convert and Family Issues

Question

Hello,

I am a convert, my wife and my daughter (8 weeks) are Jewish. I have a Gentile ex-spouse, with whom I fathered two children almost 10 years ago.

My question pertains to Ezra 10:10-11 as well as the portion in the Talmud (Yevamot 23a).

How does this apply to me with parental & paternal Gentile children not being a Jewish man’s children, even if his seed made them.

I wasn’t Jewish when I conceived them, but I am now.

As heartbreaking as it seems, I just want to follow halacha and do what’s right by them as well.

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Answers

  1. First, Mazal Tov on the birth of your daughter! May she grow up to be a source of immeasurable Nachat to you and your wife.

    In general, you should continue to have a relationship with your children. You should be a part of their lives and they should know and feel that their father loves them and supports their endeavors. If your divorce from your ex-wife was amicable, I think it is correct that you continue to have a peaceful interaction with her as well. There will be all kinds of issues that will crop up with regards to the children that you share, and it would be best if there is a healthy avenue of communication between you.

    If, however, your being in touch with your ex-wife will be a cause of friction between you and your wife, you will need to speak with one of your spiritual mentors to discuss what might be the best way to proceed. In any event, I think that you should be in constant contact with your spiritual mentors to help you through this potentially difficult situation.

    Best wishes from the AskTheRabbi.org Team