Bat Mitzvah Importance and Questions


My sister Chasya just turned 12. However, we are making her Bat Mitzvah party on her Jewish birthday. I am her older sister wanting to ask a few questions. My father is a Kohen but wasn’t able to answer these questions. I found this website and decided to write my questions here.

1.How is a cow kosher if we use it for dairy and meat?

2.What do I teach my sister about being a Bat Mitzvah?

3.How should I help her as a new Bat Mitzvah in the family?

4.(For older sibling) How to deal with antisemitic bullying at a public school?



  1. First, mazal Tov on your sister’s Bat Mitzvah. Please accept my blessing that your sister grow to become an integral member of the Jewish nation and that she be a source of immeasurable joy to you and to your entire family!

    1. Great question! The Rabbis teach that the milk of the cow is considered to be a separate entity from its meat. Once the milk exits the cow, it is not longer an integral part of it, and, according to the intricacies of Jewish Law, it is not considered to have any connection to the meat of the cow.

    2. The idea of Bat Mitzvah is that a girl becomes obligated in the Mitzvot at the age twelve years and one day. The law is ancient and has its sources in the Written Torah, but it is principally based on the Oral Tradition and is recorded in the Babylonian Talmud in Niddah, 47-48, and in Yevamot, 80. It is legislated in Maimonides’ Mishnah Torah, Ishut 2:1-2 and in the Code of Jewish law in Orach Chaim 55 and in Even Haezer.

    However, perhaps the most important thing to convey to your sister is that her Bat Mitzvah is probably the most important important moment in her life! Why is that? Because there is really nothing more important and vital than becoming an adult member of the Jewish nation. Being obligated in the commandments is what defines us as being connected to and belonging to God. And there is nothing greater and more glorious than that!

    3. I would suggest by being a personal example to your sister. If she sees her older sister living Judaism and enjoying Judaism that is, by far, the very best way to help her forge her own relationship with God.

    4. What a disturbing question. It is hard for me to know exactly what to tell you because I think that a lot depends on the kind of bullying that is taking place. But, I do think that one thing is for sure, if there is any kind of physical danger your sibling should go straight to their teacher or principal. If that is not something that they feel that they can do then, at the very least, they should get your parents involved immediately.

    Best wishes from the Team