Question
I am wondering about something because it is in this week’s parasha. The parasha has a prohibition against crossdressing. A lot of crossdressing occurs for two reasons: one is for professional costume and another because of a fetish. Many people cross dress in professional costume for a parnassa (livelihood) and not because they want to hurt anyone. If someone needs to cross dress for a parnassa and doesn’t know how to earn a living any other way, are they still prohibited from doing so? And what about someone who has a fetish. Fetishism is a medical disorder and one might not have control. It is easy to say one has control by simply not doing it if you do not have the disorder. Coming from a family of psychologists, I understand that one who has this form of fetishism does not have any more control over their cross dressing than an alcoholic has over their drinking. Would a cross dresser really be punished by G-d just because of their disease that G-d created them with?

Question
What does Jewish teaching say about a person who has an inborn personality trait or physiological or mental health issue that makes it impossible or nearly impossible to avoid breaching a certain negative commandment? For example, one who is unable to restrain oneself from speaking lashon hora, no matter how hard they try, because they have a brain that makes them behave impulsively and lack self-control? Or one who cannot concentrate on his prayers because his mind is too easily distracted and this is unavoidable. Is such a person really responsible for their sins, or are they pardoned for their wrongdoing?

Question
Why is giving charity to the poor such an important principle in Judaism?

Question
My wife and I now have five girls. We never had a boy. We both wanted one, but it never happened. My wife is done with pregnancy and doesn’t want to carry another baby or increase the size of our family. I very much respect her feelings. I love all my daughters, don’t get me wrong about it. But since I don’t have a son, have I failed to fulfill any mitzvah? What can I do about this?

Question
My wife and I recently discovered the YouTube channel of an Orthodox Jewish woman who sings the most beautiful songs. My wife and I are huge fans. At the start of each video, before she sings, she has a message that says “for women only.” She presumably expects on honor that only women will listen to her music because obviously she has no control. I personally believe there is no Torah violation in listening to a woman’s voice electronically. Is it really that bad to listen to her music if the only thing I am doing wrong is violating her own personal request with which I disagree and not the halacha I learned growing up that I follow?

Question
Shalom aleichem Rabbi Lauffer. Thank you for answering my last question. If one urinates a few drops on the toilet seat on Shabbos, is he permitted to wipe off the urine with a detached toilet paper, or would this be forbidden because urine is muktzeh. Thanks a lot.

Question
I have been diagnosed with a heart condition that is aggravated by wearing heavy clothes in a warm environment. My doctor gave me instructions to wear as little clothes as possible when it’s hot. She says dressing the modest way I have been doing for many years is actually detrimental to my health. She has advised me to wear only loose fitting sleeveless tops when it is hot in the summer and short sleeves in spring and fall weather. She said shorts are preferred, but knee-length elastic waist skirts or sundresses are okay too. If I don’t follow this, I could be hospitalized and my life could be on the line. What am I supposed to do if the doctor tells me not to dress modestly?

Question
Hello. Thank you for your good work here, providing insight for so many. I am currently in an outpatient program for my mental health-- in recovery Baruch Hashem. In the program we occasionally have groups on mindfulness. While most modern mindfulness I believe is free from the false-deities or idols of its roots, I still have chosen to step out from these groups and sat outside during the mindfulness out of concern that these practices still find their sources in things like Zen, Vipassanā and other eastern meditative practices. As a baal teshuvah who was involved with some of these practices before returning to Judaism through the help of Hashem via the wisdom of Hasidism, I have left these paths behind and generally tried to steer clear of them. That being said, some of the staff working with me on my treatment have expressed concern that I have been stepping out of many groups and therefore not maximizing my important treatment. Furthermore, one of my supports has suggested me a respected website for online therapy and mental health support. The website also has options for mindfulness practices-- am I allowed to make use of the majority of the website while steering clear of these elements? And for my outpatient treatment, am I allowed to be present in groups on mindfulness, but perhaps doing my own Jewish Meditations during these sessions? I know this is a delicate subject and a complex one given that mindfulness practices may vary based on a particular path or therapeutic system. That being said, I appreciate any help and look forward to your response.