Question
I live together with my sister in the house where we grew up. Since our father died, it’s now just us and no one else. When we were sitting shiva for our father, a local rabbi we don’t know paid us a visit and at first seemed helpful. He soon discovered our living arrangements. He approached us as the end of shloshim neared and told us it’s forbidden for us to live together on a permanent basis. Now he is pressuring us to find separate places to live. We can’t afford to live separately and we don’t want to either. We just went through many years of caring for our elderly parents and we do not want to further change what’s familiar to us. We want to ignore him and be ourselves, but he keeps calling us and acts like it’s his business. We are not incestuous. We are just a brother and sister who never married and we take care of each other. We have other siblings who did marry and have children and they are religious people and they don’t oppose us living together. Only this one rabbi we don’t even know is bothering us.

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hello rabbi, I am converting in yeshiva. However, I have a girlfriend who also wants to convert. Am I doing the right thing? after all, I have almost passed, and she is just beginning her journey into Jewry.

Question
Shalom Rabbi, I am in the final stages of planning to become a Gher and in doing so resolving some outstanding Halachic questions concerning my final decision to go ahead with --exclusively of course-- an Orthodox conversion. I was born to an intermarriage whereby my mother was not Jewish at the time of my birth. My father has passed away and i no longer have anything to do with his family and haven't for many years. My question concerns the decision I must make --whether or not to keep my current last name due to the mitzvah of honoring one's parents. (my name which is also my father's last name is associated with his avera, having committed the sin of intermarriage with my non-Jewish mother). Now, my instincts tell me to go ahead with legally changing my last name just prior (or immediately after) completion of the mikvah / Gher-ceremony. This is my current plan. However i wanted to get a confirmation from you as to whether this is a) Halachically required B) strongly recommended or C) as a matter of Jewish Law it makes no difference. Common sense tells me --as I understand Hashem-- G-d would NOT want me to carry the last name that is so directly associated with the avera of intermarriage. In fact, and to be sure, my thought is to blot this name (which is "Gilman") completely out from me and my life. In summary, given that the family name is clearly so very closely associated with marriage and family life, and given the very important Mitzvah to honor one's parents [and I quote] "honor your father and mother that thy days may be long" it is clear to me that changing my name will certainly not be honoring my father. However, the question becomes whether or not this mitzvah applies to a situation where the father has transgressed the Torah in such a terrible way. (not only marrying a non-Jewish mother but also having non-Jewish offspring). Does the "Honor Parents" mitzvah apply to: a family name change --when such a change will occur in the process of becoming a gher--a completely new relationship with Hashem, with a "renewed" Jewish nishama (who after all, was in fact at Mt. Sinai and participated with Israel in agreeing to completely accept the covenant with G-d in acceptance of the 613 Mitzvot. Your kind answer is very much appreciated. Toda Arba and Shalom. Sincerely, Colin Gilman

Question
Earlier today, I saw one of my neighbors, an orthodox Jew who I have seen around but don’t know his name, repeatedly beating one of his sons as punishment for something that is unclear what. I filmed part of the beating from my apartment window, but the film is not clear enough to ascertain what was going on. What this father was doing looked so bad, I felt like calling 911. But I was uncertain if I should call the civil authorities on my fellow Jew. I also didn’t know if the police would consider this a crime or not because parents do have the legal right to spank their children. Regardless, I thought this treatment of his son went too far for what would be reasonable punishment. I have 4 children of my own and I would never do that to any of them, no matter how badly they behaved. I don’t believe what my neighbor was doing would fix any behavioral issues. I also wasn’t sure if reporting this is considered Lashon Hara.

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I am invited to a wedding of a Cohen and a divorced woman who are marrying in violation of Torah law. Is it permitted to go?

Question
My friend and I have tickets to a concert that we purchased several months ago. Unfortunately, my friend lost one of her parents two weeks ago. She is therefore not permitted to go to this concert. Except she is refusing to observe this halacha that she knows full well exists and insists on not observing. If she independently got herself there, I couldn’t stop her. But she depends on me for transportation to the theater because she doesn’t drive in the dark. She wants me to provide her transportation to this concert. If I refuse to take her, she will probably have no other way to get there. What this boils down to is if I cave to her demands and take her to the concert, which I promised her I would do before her parent’s death, I will be sinning by helping her sin. To avoid committing the sin of aiding another’s sin, I would have to stand up to her and be an enforcer of Halacha, which I simply do not have the spine to do. She is a dear friend. I feel I cannot let her down by controlling her behavior and her Torah observance in the worst time of her life. I feel torn.

Question
Help! I just got married two weeks ago and started covering my hair. I find after this short time that I cannot stand covering my hair. It is so uncomfortable, I feel like dying. I have tried all kinds of hair coverings, from sheitls to scarves to different types of hats, and they all bother me and I feel I can never get used to it. I cannot take the misery this is causing me. I just married the greatest man in the world, but I feel like a prisoner being forced to wear a hair covering. My husband says he wouldn’t mind if I don’t cover my hair, and he would rather I be comfortable than to comply with this requirement. But I find myself in a community that would be very judgmental if I didn’t. I’m afraid that members of our community would snub me if I didn’t follow this. There is even a synagogue around here that has a sign on the door that says married women must have their hair covered to enter the building. What am I to do?